This blog has me in stitches - make sure you check the comments, they're
great...
I'm not a ghoul. I don't stop to watch the scene of traffic accidents or house fires, and I prefer not to see what's being done if I have to have any kind of medical treatment - like having blood taken, or being stitched after tearing while giving birth. I'm not squeamish, I just prefer not to watch.
So why am I sitting here half-watching
All New Cosmetic Surgery Live?
There's something horribly compelling about the things people pay to have done to their bodies. Liposuction while awake and standing up so you can dictate where you want the fat sucked out, anyone? (It was the sight of the surgeon shoving the canula back and forth under the skin - and the gooey chunks of yellow fat squidging through the pipes - that put me off, I think.) Or having strips of skin snipped off your eyelids to get rid of droopy eyes, perhaps? Rib removal for an hourglass figure? And I can't
imagine what benefit a meatotomy can provide... (No I'm not going to describe it. If you want to know, google it. It's hellishly ugly.)
I think the most disturbing programme I saw, however, was about a year ago, a 16 year old girl in the States who wanted breast implants. Her surgeon was a white-haired, bearded, grandfatherly figure who should, in my opinion, be struck off. Her mother was all for the procedure. She'd had surgery herself, from an early age...
The mother was probably the ugliest woman - uglier even than
Jocelyn - I've ever seen, with a face like a scrotum, orange blotchy skin sagging all over her body and thin, orange hair. The best advert
against body modification you could ever wish to see.
Well, the op went ahead. At the end of it the girl was obviously not happy with what had been done. But what pissed me off more than anything was the bloody surgeon patting her on the shoulder saying - "there you go - you're cured." Cured of what? Being herself?
Bastard.
Of course, surgery after accident or illness is a completely different handful of crickets: it's the sort that panders to human vanity (and makes the surgeons very rich) that disturbs me. It's probably the accompanying mind-set that believes that money can solve everything, that no-one needs to actually
work to achieve their goals. (I know, bit of a sweeping statement there, I don't feel strongly enough about the subject to spare haddock presenting a detailed argument.) It does tend to make me wonder if I'd ever consider it, though.
I prefer the real. The only dye I've ever used on my hair is henna (the real, gungy stuff that stains
everything) and then only for three years at Uni. I won't dye it now, or even
consider a perm, because in my experience dyed and permed hair never looks natural (sorry Valkyie - I'm a hairdresser's nightmare!) and I prefer to be my natural self rather than how some so-called 'beauty expert' (tch', what are they called these days? Are fashionistas just concerned with clothing or do they cover the overall look? Eh, whatever...) decrees I should look. So by rights I shouldn't even consider the idea. But...
As I get older, I find it increasingly hard to lose weight/maintain a decent level of fitness. Spending so much time sitting in front of the computer doesn't help, of course, though there's not a hell of a lot I can do about that - well, not until someone comes up with a strap-on portable computer/keyboard/heads-up display that I can use while walking or exercising, anyway. So yes, I can imagine myself having liposuction, offputtingness notwithstanding, if only to get rid of excess baggage on stomach, backside and thighs: once gone, it should be easier to keep it off. And the females in my family are 'jowly' and double-chinned, and my face is going the same way. I don't like it, and would like to have it gone.
I'd also like breast reduction (yes, reduction. They've served their purpose and now just get in the way!) If money were no object - which of course it is - I would consider surgery for those areas. Not to make myself feel more attractive - I don't need other people's admiration to boost my ego, gods know it's big enough by itself! - but I'd feel physically more comfortable. Does that make me a hypocrite? Personally I don't think so: if I could achieve the desired result without surgery then I'd go for it (and already am where the weight/exercise is concerned)... [grin]
OK - given the response to my question re: the Mary-Sue Avenger, I'm going to assume a general lack of interest and drop the idea.
Right, back to work!
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Joules *Dances with Haddock* Taylor
pontificated this at 10:34 pm
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